A letter to a future me

Dear Sarah,

I'm writing this letter in the hope that you will read it in the future whenever you are struggling, or stressed, or worried and that it might help in some way.

First of all, I want you to remember what it felt like today. Today, when the scales were showing 9st 11lb and, when you'd had all your hair cut off and everyone was telling you how great it looked (while we at it, remember that; if you are undecided about having short hair...just do it, it really suits you). And remember how it felt to have just finished your teacher training course, and all the positive feedback you got from the teachers, telling you what potential to become a great teacher you had. Remember that feeling, because that's the feeling that you deserve to feel all the time.

And I know you won't feel like that all the time, but on those days when you are struggling to find the motivation to get out of bed, when you're wondering if teaching really is the right career for you, or when you feel guilty because you over-consumed then try and remember how you felt today. Remember the hard work it took to get there, and most of all, don't give up. 

Please, please don't ever slide back into the downward spiral of self-destruction that over-eating brings. Think about how good it felt to buy those size 10 jeans for the first time in over a decade, think about how looking in the mirror is a pleasure, not a exercise in pain and criticism. Remember the promises you made to yourself and think before you eat. Don't deny yourself, but just remember that 'one more slice' will make a difference.

If you feel lonely, or like you're in this all alone, then remember your friends. Remember all the fun you've had, the comedy you've seen and the amount of time you've spent laughing. Remember those people, who maybe you aren't in touch with any more, but who were there to offer support and love whenever you needed it. You still have people like that, and don't forget to return the favour when those people need you. 


Remember that playing the ukulele will always make you smile.


Mostly, just remember how lucky you are to have a happy, healthy family who support you in everything that you do (both emotionally and financially!), and don't be too hard on yourself. And always, always remember that whatever happened today and however crappy you feel, tomorrow is a new day.


I love you,


Sarah x